How to stop a relationship in Cambodia
How to stop a relationship in Cambodia
Hi.
How to stop a relationship in Cambodia - read: Get the partner and her children to move away from my house? Is there any rules, unwritten as well?
I have been trying to stop the relationship the last four months, but has failed when it came to my girlfriends compensation demands.
She came 15 months ago with nothing, not true, 2 plastic bags and two children parked two different places, and a family debt that I cleared after one month. Since then we have taken care of some family, and our self incl. her two children.
I do not have that much money so I have simply invested every single dollar I have had to disposal in our daily life, school for the children, money to the Grandma, etc. etc.
Despite her improved situation my girlfriend cant understand and accept that she has to take her part of the daily responsibilities. And it even gets worser and worser on a weekly or monthly basic.
Its so bad for me at the moment that I cant get her out of the house fast enough. I have even considered just to pack the most important belongings, and then bye bye. Run away.
What is my rights in this? And hers? I have provided a compensation, I am ready to take care of the childrens education, but she reject it all. As I see it she simply dos´nt want to leave.
What will happen if I pack her stuff and place it outside the house and get some money handed over or transferred to her? Will that be accepted by the local head of the village and the police?
Or how else can I stop that relationship?
Sorry about my English
How to stop a relationship in Cambodia - read: Get the partner and her children to move away from my house? Is there any rules, unwritten as well?
I have been trying to stop the relationship the last four months, but has failed when it came to my girlfriends compensation demands.
She came 15 months ago with nothing, not true, 2 plastic bags and two children parked two different places, and a family debt that I cleared after one month. Since then we have taken care of some family, and our self incl. her two children.
I do not have that much money so I have simply invested every single dollar I have had to disposal in our daily life, school for the children, money to the Grandma, etc. etc.
Despite her improved situation my girlfriend cant understand and accept that she has to take her part of the daily responsibilities. And it even gets worser and worser on a weekly or monthly basic.
Its so bad for me at the moment that I cant get her out of the house fast enough. I have even considered just to pack the most important belongings, and then bye bye. Run away.
What is my rights in this? And hers? I have provided a compensation, I am ready to take care of the childrens education, but she reject it all. As I see it she simply dos´nt want to leave.
What will happen if I pack her stuff and place it outside the house and get some money handed over or transferred to her? Will that be accepted by the local head of the village and the police?
Or how else can I stop that relationship?
Sorry about my English
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Right? Nah, you're screwed.
You're her only mealticket for her old age. Without you, a single mother with dependents has no value to Cambodian breadwinners.
Options:
You could leave. Forever.
You could leave until you think she's moved on.
You could pretend to leave: move to the other side of town, tell her you've had to go visit your sick ma, email her "from your home country" with increasing infrequency until she appears to get bored and give up. Then stay on the other side of town. Forever.
You're her only mealticket for her old age. Without you, a single mother with dependents has no value to Cambodian breadwinners.
Options:
You could leave. Forever.
You could leave until you think she's moved on.
You could pretend to leave: move to the other side of town, tell her you've had to go visit your sick ma, email her "from your home country" with increasing infrequency until she appears to get bored and give up. Then stay on the other side of town. Forever.
I came, I argued, I'm out
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George, both parties don't have to consent to a break up. It's not like you're launching missiles from a submarine and you both have to turn your keys.
Follow my lame Twitter feed: @gavin_mac
The sad thing is that her life, her children´s, and her Grandmothers life has improved 1000% since she moved in here, and that I would love to keep the relationship going if she could handle her role in the daily life.andyinasia wrote:Right? Nah, you're screwed.
You're her only mealticket for her old age. Without you, a single mother with dependents has no value to Cambodian breadwinners.
Options:
You could leave. Forever.
You could leave until you think she's moved on.
You could pretend to leave: move to the other side of town, tell her you've had to go visit your sick ma, email her "from your home country" with increasing infrequency until she appears to get bored and give up. Then stay on the other side of town. Forever.
What can she do if I leave her stuff outside the main door before I leave for some days or weeks? Will she get any support from police if she go there?
Her husband just left her, he has´nt seen his children since then. No money to his wife, nothing.
As soon as my girlfriend has finished the compensation money from me, there is only one way she can earn money enough, so the children will be spread out to foster families one more time.
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As I said, a desperate woman with no other options won't let you go. You can kick them out and leave their bags on the street, but she will stalk you. The entire neighbourhood will sympathise with her and make you feel like shit. As long as she knows where you are, you'll get no peace. Rights, the law etc are of no relevance here. You will need to disappear or pay a break-up fee. That's what I did in the end re. my 'Grizzled' relationship.
I came, I argued, I'm out
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I've corrected that for you.andyinasia wrote:As I said, a desperate parasite with no other options won't let you go.
OP, many other expats have found themselves in this woeful elephant trap. If you live in a rented property, just pack your bags and walk away. If you own the property, you're fucked - and not in a good way.
Twitter: Not my circus, not my monkeys - I sold #K440
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samba:
Paul Simon wrote a good song about this
Just hop on the bus, Gus
No need to discuss much
Just drop the tv
And set yourself free
PS it's not good if she knows where you work
Paul Simon wrote a good song about this
Just hop on the bus, Gus
No need to discuss much
Just drop the tv
And set yourself free
PS it's not good if she knows where you work
ירי ילדים והפצצת אזרחים דורש אומץ, כמו גם הטרדה מינית של עובדי ההוראה.
I think you are looking for the path of least resistance. If that is the case.............I would simply disappear for a while, and leave some break up money behind.
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Fixed itvladimir wrote:samba:
Paul Simon wrote a good song about this
Just hop on the bus, Gus
No need to discuss much
Just drop off the key lee
And set yourself free
PS it's not good if she knows where you work
i'm the one who has to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life the way i want to
Thanks. Its not my style to just run away. I think I will feel like a coward if I end up doing that. But then again, I have tried to be a good person for more than a year, and the last 4 months tried to make an agreement to get out.LoneStar wrote:I think you are looking for the path of least resistance. If that is the case.............I would simply disappear for a while, and leave some break up money behind.
If I run, I will maybe loose lost of goods.
How much re we talking about in break up money? I have offered her so she can handle to find a new place to live, and money enough for some months. After she has talk with her friends and family, she return and demand much much more.
Etc etc
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RUN.Samba wrote:I have offered her so she can handle to find a new place to live, and money enough for some months. After she has talk with her friends and family, she return and demand much much more.
NOW.
ירי ילדים והפצצת אזרחים דורש אומץ, כמו גם הטרדה מינית של עובדי ההוראה.
If you live rented: Move out yourself and cancel the rental agreement with (payed by you) 3-6 months notice and let the ex know this. The value of the goods left behind and additional months rent are the goodbye money.
If you own the house: Move out yourself, sell to a broker, pay 3-6 months rent to the broker and let him cancel the rent because she can't pay any longer. It's going to cost you an awful lot of money in depreciated value of the house.
They'll loose their honey pot, so they will do anything to get you back. You'll have to move far away.
You may want to consider to reach the situation your ex doesn't want you any longer, though that might be difficult given their low standard: Shame for the family with what you do, etc. Mental abuse might be an option, though common in Cambodia, not done from western point of view. Though be careful, lock your door while asleep, otherwise your manhood might be fed to the chickens.
If you own the house: Move out yourself, sell to a broker, pay 3-6 months rent to the broker and let him cancel the rent because she can't pay any longer. It's going to cost you an awful lot of money in depreciated value of the house.
They'll loose their honey pot, so they will do anything to get you back. You'll have to move far away.
You may want to consider to reach the situation your ex doesn't want you any longer, though that might be difficult given their low standard: Shame for the family with what you do, etc. Mental abuse might be an option, though common in Cambodia, not done from western point of view. Though be careful, lock your door while asleep, otherwise your manhood might be fed to the chickens.
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