Sex for ammo
This morning I lucked out and was able to buy two boxes of ammo. I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home. Stopped at a gas station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up her car at the next pump. She glanced at the two boxes of ammo, bent over and leaned in my passenger window, and said in a sexy voice "I'm a big believer in barter, old fella. Would you be interested in trading S.E.X. for ammo?" I thought for a few seconds and asked,
"What kind of ammo 'ya got?"
A testimony to true friendship is...
A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work.
His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.
"My hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are
not done, I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with
cooking tonight! What the hell did you bring him home for?"
"Because he's thinking of getting married."
The Earth is degenerating these days. Bribery and corruption abound.
Children no longer mind their parents, every man wants to write a book,
and it is evident that the end of the world is fast approaching.
--Assyrian Stone Tablet, c.2800 BCE