Marathon (half) Man……

Posted on by Gavinmac


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Acclaimed 440 e-mail hoaxer Gavin Mac fancies running the Ankor Half Marathon. But first he needs to straighten out a few details……

tour@angkorwatmarathon.org
Dear Marathon Director-
from “Gavin Mac”

I am very excited about entering the 2005 Angkor Wat International Half Marathon. I just love to run! Your event interests me because I have participated in foot races at many other great world wonders, including the 1997 Taj Mahal 10K, the 2002 Kilimanjaro Downhill Dash, and the ill-fated 2003 Great Barrier Reef Relay.

I do have one small issue that I need to bring to your attention. I run like a girl. By this, I mean that I don”t bend my legs, I flail my hands, and I wiggle my buttocks from side to side. I have had this problem my whole life. When I was a young boy, the doctors could never explain WHY I run like a girl. None of the other men in my family run like girls. (My uncle Toby throws like a girl).

I have printed out your entry application, and I would like to know whether I should enter your event under the male or female division. If it”s OK, I would like to enter under the female division, because my condition prevents me from running as fast as most men. If this is not OK, please let me know if you will consider adding a separate division for ‘Men who run like girls.’ I think I could be very competitive in that division. I once finished second to Elton John in a sack race.

Thank you for your consideration of my request. I arrive in Siem Reap next week and I am looking forward to the big race.

Gavin Mac

and he got a reply……..


To:”gavinmac”
subject:Half Marathon Date:Mon, 14 Nov 2005 08:51:05 +0700

Dear Mr.Gavin Mac,

Thanks for your interested on Angkor Wat International Half Marathon 2005 .
As your case i’ll discuse with our commitee’s . Any way, may i know about your running before? for example, Taj Mahal 10Km, Kilimanjaro Dash …etc ,
What kind of the race that you chose when you joined in that event ?
How about the commitee’s , they’re allowed you to run in female or male division ?
When will you arrive in Siem Reap ?

I”m waiting for your reply .

Please feel free to contact us if you need more information .

Thanks & Best Reguards,
Channak (Mis)

It carries on

Dear Ms. Channak

Thank you for your prompt reply.

I’ll be honest with you, Ms. Channak. Most race organizers insist that I run in the male division, because I am a man. The directors of the Taj Mahal 10K did allow me to run in the female division. But they insisted that I had to run dressed as an Indian woman, so that no one would know I was really a man. Because of that, I finished in a very disappointing 137th place. I believe I could have won that race if I had not been slowed down by the red dot on my forehead.

I have run in several half marathons in America in the ‘men who run like girls’ division. This is the division I prefer, although sometimes I do get sick of always losing to Richard Simmons.

I arrive in Siem Reap in two days. Please let me know what the committe decides. I will bring a women”s running outfit just in case.

Gavin Mac

Intigued or undeterred, Ms. Chanak continued into the maze.

greensales @online.com.kh> To:”gavin mac”
Subject:Half Marathon

Dear Mr.Gavin Mac,

As your case that you told me , our committee’s decided you to chose Man Half (21Km) .
Sorry that we can’t help you to run with Lady Half.
Our commitee”s deviced into 10 race like :
– Man Half
– Lady Half
– Men’s 10 Km
– Lady 10 Km
– Lady 05Km
– 4Km Family
– 10Km artificial
– 21Km Wheel chair
– walking 10Km
– Walking 05Km

All of these you can chose one in each of race type . For my advice i want you to join with 4Km Family cause it”s open for alls . I’m so sorry that i can’t help you , any way you can join with Man Half .

Please feel free to contact us if you need more information .

Thanks & Best Reguards ,

Channak (Mis)

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