Jamie_Lambo wrote:Bonander wrote:Thanks for the added posts. However I'm having a little trouble following what you're all saying.
1. What is a grey girl.
2. I found what Barang means. Is there a social or sexual stigma associated with a woman with a history that includes a Barang boyfriend?
3. Does having had such a boyfriend imply that she's no longer a virgin?
If so, why? And why would, say, a history of a Khmer boyfriend NOT imply the same thing?
a grey girl is a girl that is not a white cloth anymore, usually used to describe sexually active girls who arent married
for me its just personal preference, i often find girls that have had Barang BF's before irritating, often picking up habits/traits from their Barang ex
yeah more often than not
im not sure how to word the answer to your last question, but for me personally see my answer above
Same here brother. I find such girls tend to carry a lot of emotional baggage, regardless of whether their ex was Khmer or foreign. I also don't really like the ones that have weird western traits or characteristics, it’s a total turn-off for me. Don't get me wrong: I don't like my girls to be of the extremely shy/quiet "srey sopheap" variety, but I also don't like the westernized chicks who always hang out with foreigners, dress like they’re from New York, speak with an awful semi-American accent or say "mate" all the time because they hang out with aussies. There's a fine line...
Anyways, it's worth mentioning that the expression sounds a bit pejorative, but it really isn't (or shouldn't be). I've dated and slept with lots of grey girls and I don't mind them too much (except those weird American accents). To be honest, by now almost all of my female friends would fall into the grey girl category. That includes girls of all walks of life, from restaurant workers to chicks who make just under $2k/month.
To answer questions 2 and 3: I personally haven't met a Khmer girl who's dated foreigners and has gone back to Khmers. I think it's for two reasons: she knows most Khmers wouldn't want her, but she's also had a taste of the "freedom" being with a foreigner means, and enjoys it. Having a boyfriend (especially Khmer) doesn't mean they're sexually active at all. Originally, having a boyfriend or girlfriend meant you were close to being engaged. Many are sexually active now, but exact numebrs are impossible to come by.
Lucky Lucan wrote:It could be used to describe a divorcee or widow too.
I think it goes without saying. Any girl who isn't a virgin anymore and was/is sexually active (and single) is a grey girl.
For the record, a while ago I was at a beer garden with a bunch of Khmer dudes (all sort of youngish mid 20s to mid 30s middle-class types) and when the topic about virginity came up, more than half of them said they didn't care about her past. Times are changing very quickly, and though it's still difficult for a girl who is known to have been sexually active (had a boyfriend, fiancée) to get a husband, especially in the countryside, it's still possible. A lot of guys aren't as hung up over it as they used to be, mainly because a lot more of the younger generation have girlfriends/boyfriends (and are sexually active together) than before.